Do not try this at home.

From: Timothy Smith (timothy.smith1@worldnet.att.net)
Date: Sun Feb 25 2001 - 00:01:16 PST


Hi list,

Sometime way back when, someone in the U.S. military decided that their
vehicles with wheels should have lug-nuts that rotated one way on one side
and another way on the other side. This is probably a holdover from the
days of horse drawn wagons. The Scout Car of course, is no different and
this is the reason for the story I am about to tell.

I woke up bright and early today and stared at the ceiling of my bedroom
while contemplating going back to sleep since Amy was already up with the
kids. Then it hit me.....today the Scout Car was going to be back on its
wheels! One hub/drum assembly to go! Well, the only way to get me out of
bed faster is to yell that the house is on fire. I got up, wet my hair
sufficiently well to reduce the Gumby look I had going (folks do slow down
in front of my house in order to see how pretty I am you know....well, maybe
its just the Scout Car) I threw on some of my grubbies and headed for the
garage to prepare for the project at hand.

Over the last few days I managed to get the front right hub, drum and drive
flange, and rear hubs, drums and axles on the Scout in something of a rather
excited state of mind. After all, the Scout chassis in the sandblasting
tent in the driveway has the major log jam in this project. I mention this
only because I want to make it clear to you, dear readers, that I was more
than halfway there already......or so I thought.

One stumbling block I knew I would encounter was having to go back into the
right front hub and re-set the depth of the grease seal since I was
reasonably certain that I had installed it without adequate clearance as I
had heard some unexplainable rubbing as I turned the hub after installation.
As the front seals are a later style they can be placed sufficiently deep in
the hub that they come in contact with the back of the inner bearing. this
would be a Bad thing

I went right to work and cleaned up the left front spindle, removed the
worst of the old grease inside the steering knuckle and reattached the
spindle, brake assembly, and slinger. I had the front left hub, drum and
drive flange on in no time as I had already packed the bearings and set the
grease seal in place at the proper depth on this hub. I then set about
going back into the right front in order to reset the grease seal depth.

As jobs go, this was quite simple. All that was necessary was to remove the
drive flange and outer bearing and replace the adjusting nut, then pull the
drum/hub out causing the inner bearing to pull against the grease seal. A
few tugs and the seal was in the right place and in a uniform depth all the
way around. No problemo! Put it all back together and admire my work,
right?

Wrong.

While tightening down the last drive flange fastener I looked at the lug on
the hub. Remember what I said earlier? Each side has its own direction.
Everything else; bearings, seals, spindles, brake assemblies, slingers, the
works can go on either side. Ok, no need to panic.....maybe I lucked
out.....check the rear lug on the same side.......

...and I quote.......S@#*)$O+&A(*/B?<%^ ! ! !

Well, my esteemed MV readers, I WANTED those wheels and tires on the Scout.
Such was my mania, that without any further thought (this is an important
phrase...."without any further thought" as it has a great deal to do with
the outcome of my story) I began undoing the drive flanges on the front hubs
in order to swap them from side to side. After all, over the course of the
last few days I have become something of a speed demon when I comes to hubs
and bearings. I can do this.....no problem.....minor setback.....Boom! In
no time at all, they were swapped out. Hell, I was so proud I cleaned up
the outside of the cups that the steering knuckles turn on. Oooh. Purty!
Yeee-eah, baby, life was good! Amy and I wanted to go to a movie in the
afternoon so I decided to put the wheels and tires on in the evening after
we returned. I went to the movie feeling like a guy who has won the
lottery.

Back from the movie, we had dinner and afterwards, I was sitting on the
couch trying to get myself going again (a full belly always slows me down)
because in my heart I was committed to having the Scout on it's wheels
before I went to bed. Suddenly, it struck me.......w h a t i f......

What if I had the rear hubs backwards in the first place? Did I swap the
front hubs when I should have been swapping the back hubs instead? I
couldn't remember taking note of how the lugs were marked. I had based my
decision to swap only on the fact that the front lugs did not match the rear
lugs. So I walked out to the Scout more like a man headed to the gallows
than a man headed to his favorite project.

Well, you guessed it. I had experienced two MAJOR brain cramps. Once when
I installed the rear hubs without paying attention to the direction of the
lugs, a second time when I removed and swapped the front hubs without paying
attention to the direction of the lugs.

Ok......I'm an idiot. I'm a complete idiot. I'm the type of idiot who
can't find his ass in the dark with both hands and a searchlight. However,
I do have one redeeming quality that gets me through times like this. I am
definately NOT a quitter. SO, I go to Walmart and buy two nice bright work
lights. Eighteen bucks but what the hell....I got an itch that REALLY needs
scratching! I return home, get back in my grubbies and lay out my lights,
my tools, my rags and solvents, my CD player and Amy brings me a big cup of
hi-test coffee. I get out my box of rubber surgical gloves because even
though I hate to wear the darned things, I am going save a bunch of time by
not having to wash my hands between tasks or wash greasy fingerprints off of
sealing surfaces or off of finished painted surfaces. Well, my brothers, I
broke all speed records and did it right........ Finally.

Ladies and gentlemen......the Scout rolls like a champ!

TJ



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